Happy Birthday Grandma!

Here's a letter I wrote to my Grandma in honor surviving the last nine decades, and all the time with a smile on her face! Hope you enjoy:

Grandma-

On your 90^th birthday, my gift is to tell you of all the gifts you have given me over the last 44 years.

I am lucky that way! You've taught me how important it is to take a compliment with grace and sincerity. After your visit to New York to meet Henry, I had taken pictures of you the old fashioned way with film! It wasn't until after you left that I had a chance to have them developed. I immediately called you and said, Grandma, you look beautiful! Your skin is literally glowing. To which you replied, I am lucky that way! Here you taught me how good it feels when someone ACCEPTS gracefully and simply a compliment!

Girls always look better in pink. This was funny to hear especially as I was going through my nothing-but-black New York phase. Ha! I scoffed at color. Then one day, when I obviously needed to do laundry, I was forced to wear a pink blouse. I swear, people came out of the woodwork. Wow. You look great. Did you cut your hair? No, I am wearing PINK! And I now I wear a lot of color and feel happier because of it.

Everyone has a different happiness scale. This life lesson has helped me so much in understanding my kids. Remember when you can to NYC after Wesley was born with Jennifer? Jennifer was a typical moody teenager and I was a hormonal, post-pregnant train wreck! I was obsessed with making Jennifer happy. In fact, I lost it on the street with her, demanding her to tell me what it was that she wanted. You calmly said to me, Vicki, maybe Jennifer is the happiest she can be at this moment. Everyone has a different happiness scale! This is brilliant in its simplicity and perfect for celebrating my boys differences.

The importance of lists! Ooh, I have to write that down! Grandma you are the Queen of Lists. Grocery lists, Funny cartoons, Check Ups, Calls to make, Foods in the freezer, if you can write it down, then it goes on a list! I used to try and keep it all in my head and failed over and over again. Now, I make lists!

Worry is wasted energy. This is my constant struggle and I think Ive called you MANY a time when I am beside myself with worry. I still imagine your telling me this and yet I manage to worry. One day (hopefully soon!), Ill master this very important lesson!

There are some things in life you'll NEVER understand. After 9/11, I was trying like mad to understand WHY my world was turned upside down and sideways. Why people Id never met hated me, my family and my country so much. I called you hysterical crying wanting to know you how you felt after you got the news of Ray Tomes death. You told me how you spent along time asking yourself why and then realized you would never get to a satisfying answer. I stopped asking and still don't understand.

Want the things you have. This is from a quote you had in your bathroom most of my life. I used to try and memorize it exactly and this is all I ever could remember. So in today's wacky economy, this is one lesson we all could use more of MORE of as it is so true! I try and make sure my kids hear it enough so that they grow up WANTING the things they HAVE!

Be generous. There are so many examples of your generosity too many to count. I love how this is part of your daily routine. You seem to make giving an everyday part of your life. There is one time I think of the most (and one I know you don't even remember!) I was in college. You know that I paid my way through UT and had to work full time to do it. However, you didn't know that I had to drive 40 minutes away to get to work which required LOTS of gas. I came home one day to an empty gas tank and an equally empty bank balance. Having NO idea how I was going to get to work (keep my job) etc., I was depressed. I for some unknown reason, I decided to get my mail (usually an activity I avoided as it was usually FILLED with notices from my bank telling me about all the bad checks I had written!). Instead, there was a letter from you. Vicki, I don't know why, but I somehow felt like you might need this and carefully tucked inside there was a crisp $10 bill. Grandma, I felt like I had won the lottery! That day taught me how random acts of kindness can change a person!

Forgive yourself. This is the gift that I count as the most precious. We all are imperfect and have our moments. You have helped me understand the joys and pitfalls of being a parent and wife. You taught me its okay to break down (but make sure you are in the shower!) and that tomorrow will always be better!

Thank you for all your gifts youve given me over the years. You have given me so much and I am grateful to have you in my life. Happy birthday, Grandma!